For months and months leading up to that college move-in day, we had it marked on our calendar. The anticipation grew as we prepared for the big day. The van was rented, our belongings were carefully packed, and the plan was set to leave at 4 in the morning. However, fate had other plans.

At the last minute, a decision was made for him to take a quarter off due to a badly fractured wrist and a recent difficult breakup. This unexpected turn of events altered our course. Instead of the anticipated departure, a new opportunity emerged.

It was then that I found myself behind the wheel of the van, a task that had taken an unforeseen twist. The request came from his Ex, asking if I could retrieve his belongings – his cherished laptop and beloved turtle – from UC Riverside. Seizing this moment, I saw a chance to embark on a journey of remembrance, a rare opportunity to revisit the place that once held my dreams – Southern Cali, Westlake Village, and Thousand Oaks.

The adventure began at 3:40 am. The road stretched ahead, and with no traffic in sight, I reached UCR by 11. Collecting his belongings, I bid farewell to Riverside and headed towards my past. Memories flooded back as I captured the essence of my earlier years in photographs. The first apartments I sought refuge in, back in 1984, were captured in a frame. The iconic swimming pool that was witness to our laughter and music, now only lived in pictures. The once vibrant Conejo Dunkball courts, where time used to stand still as we played basketball, had given way to a parking lot and bathrooms, erasing the blue three-point line and the low-hanging baskets.

My footsteps led me to Westlake High School, my alma mater. In that moment, a bittersweet realization dawned upon me. This was a tour of both farewell and retirement, an exclusive invitation that only I had received. The Mrs checked in on me, unaware of the youthful exuberance that was coursing through me during this fleeting journey.

As I approach my 51st birthday tomorrow, the question of what I desire lingers in the air. And the answer is clear: one last encounter with the air of Westlake and Thousand Oaks, to close my eyes and immerse myself in the place where it all began – in the year 1984, at the Los Feliz Apartments on 2015 Los Feliz Ave #2, Thousand Oaks, CA 91362. This is the essence of #reFugeeLife.